The Bastard Refugee Carnivore Experience: Phase 1
Next Memorial Day I have a tall order to fill. I have to get a body that has been neglected for decades in good enough shape to complete a Murph. It’s amazing how the years slip away when you’re overcommitted and don’t take the time to re-center and look critically at where you are and where you really want to be.
As it turns out, I have a lot of unfucking to do. Physical is the tip of the iceberg, but you have to start somewhere, right? I didn’t set out to put on extra weight. Or to fail to exercise. Or to lose flexibility and balance. It crept up on me because of a prolonged period of neglect. It was a trade off. There are only so may hours in a day, and the hours were needed for other things at the time. What’s done is done! How does one break out of a rut like this?
Regularly evaluate yourself: look at things as they are and consider where / how you want them to be
Identify areas that you want to improve or change
Start doing something about it without delay (recognition is good, but action is essential)
It is helpful to have real goals with real deadlines to help you on your way. For me, accepting my friend’s Murph challenge is one such stepping stone. But, it’s a long way off, right? If I don’t break it down and be somewhat systematic about it, the time will fly by as it always does and I’ll be in the same situation that I started in.
Here is my starting point. I jumped on the scale, the great humility distributor. Shit! No wonder I don’t feel great. Where the hell am I storing and extra 40-50 pounds? I guess it doesn’t matter. It’s time to make a plan to start chipping away at it. Exercise, or any activity for that matter, at heavier weights causes more stress on bones and joints, which can be counterproductive if one isn’t careful not to over do it. There’s no way these arms are going to be able lift my big ass up and to do 100 pull ups while wearing a 20 pound weight vest unless I drop some major poundage.
Over the years I have read extensively about health, wellness, and weight loss. It’s a shame that my body hasn’t developed the ability to reap the benefits by osmosis. Carbohydrate restricted lifestyles have many health benefits, among which are weight loss and maintenance of a healthy body weight. The only hard part is that sugar is more addictive than crack. I decided to start a 90 day trial of a modified carnivore regimen and to see where it takes me. Bye Bye Sugar! Twitch. Scratch. Scratch. Scratch. Twitch.
To clarify, I said modified carnivore. It’s a matter of practicality and lack of control. I work out of town and when I do I live in my office. Literally hospital bound. This puts me at the mercy of what’s available in the cafeteria. It’s ok though. With a little planning I can do this. Bring some food from home. Set aside extra food when they have what I need. Use intermittent fasting periods if necessary. Water. Black coffee. Piece of cake! Twitch.
I allowed myself to have an occasional Mountain Dew Zero during the transition. No more than one per day. Twenty ounce, not 2 liter. Plenty of Himalayan Sea salt. Some pepper. Pretty simple.
Today marks 2 weeks on the bastard refugee carnivore experience. How’s it going? Why thank you for asking. At the 2 week mark I have lost 18 pounds. I really feel it in my flanks. I feel more mobile already.
It is difficult to say how the transition to ketosis made me feel. We were short staffed at work and I ended up sleeping way too little as a result. I caught a mild cold about week in. Seven to eight days in, my appetite really fell off. I quickly kicked the cold (a few days) and my energy really picked up despite what I know was inadequate sleep and rest.
Off to a good start so far. I feel well and I'‘m getting results. Progress isn’t always linear and quantifiable, but when the results are tangible, it is certainly encouraging.
I’m thinking of this like bootcamp. Have you ever heard it said that when you go to bootcamp, the first thing that they do is break you down and then they build you back up again? They never broke me. It’s hard to break a smart ass. In phase 1 of my preparations, I plan to break my body down to a more suitable starting weight and then in phase 2 I will begin to build it back up again with physical conditioning.
“The Murph”
(performed in body armor or 20 pound weight vest)
1 mile run
100 pull ups
200 push ups
300 air squats
1 mile run
